Jokes

Jokes


Page 5
421 This guy is walking past a wooden fence. On the other side of the fence is an asylum. The inmates are all screaming at the tops of their lungs, "Thirteen! Thirteen! THIRTEEN!!" The guy notices a small hole in the fence and his curiosity naturally gets the better of him. He takes a peek and a finger suddenly pops out and jabs him in the eye. He yells in pain as the inmates start shouting, "Fourteen! Fourteen! FOURTEEN!!" 422 What's red and sits in the corner? A naughty bus! 423 Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the rooster on the other side. 424 Two Bears in an airing cupboard, which one is in the army ? The one on the tank !! boom boom 425 A little boy mouse goes into a music shop and asks for a mouse­‐organ. The shopkeeper says: "That's a coincidence, we had a little girl mouse in here yesterday, asking for the same thing." The mouse replies: "That must have been our Monica." 426 A doctor says to his patient, 'I have bad news and worse news'. 'Oh dear, what's the bad news?' asks the patient. The doctor replies, 'You only have 24 hours to live'. 'That's terrible', said the patient. 'How can the news possibly be worse?' The doctor replies, 'I've been trying to contact you since yesterday'. 427 What do baby apes sleep in? Apricots! 428 Two hunters were walking through the woods. Suddenly, a naked lady stepped out of the brush and said, "I'm game!", so they shot her. 429 Man1 "My wife's gone to the West Indies." Man2 "Jamaica?" Man1 "No she went of her own accord": 430 How do you keep your nose from running? Teach it to WALK!